


Are you ready to play?

by iloveitblue



Series: Prompts [344]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, Phil gets genderswapped
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-29
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-17 00:56:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5847628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iloveitblue/pseuds/iloveitblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where Phil gets turned into a woman.</p><p>Phil is still a man, he just temporarily got turned into a woman so I still used male pronouns.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Are you ready to play?

**Author's Note:**

> Phil is still a man, he just temporarily got turned into a woman so I still used male pronouns.

“Avengers, report.” Coulson barked into his comm, looking around for any more civilians. 

“All clear on my end, sir.” Black Widow reported.

“Watch your six, widow.” Hawkeye said just as Natasha swirled to punch another HYDRA agent. 

“Okay, now I have all clear.” Black Widow sighed.

“Iron Man, Thor. What’s the aerial status?”

“We’ve got two more jets incoming,” Iron Man zoomed through the sky like a rocket. Thor whooped loudly as he bypassed Iron Man and landed on one of the jets, effectively cracking the windshield. “Correction, we have one more jet incoming. Heads up, Cap. Looks like its raining men.” Tony snickered into the comm. 

“Thor, catch them.” Captain America instructed just as he knocked out three more agents. 

“Barrel o’ monkeys, Thor.” Tony suggested. 

“Is this the flying monkeys you once told us about?” Thor asked, even as he caught one HYDRA agent in the air. 

“Different monkeys, but close enough.” Iron Man shrugged, firing repulsor blasts at the jets’ engines. 

“Focus people. We still have civilians in the vicinity.” Coulson ordered. “Widow, secure 25th, Captain, cover her.”

“Copy that,” Captain and Widow said simultaneously as they ran towards 25th. “Hawkeye, do you think you can keep the path clear for us?” Captain asked, punching his way through more HYDRA agents. 

“Roger that.” Hawkeye grinned, firing off arrow after arrow at the hostiles headed for Steve and Natasha.

“That stopped being funny after the 50th time.” Steve snarked. 

“To you, maybe. To us, it’s still funny.” Tony chuckled. 

“Captain, Widow. I got a SHIELD Quinjet headed to your location. Iron Man, escort the jet in and out of the location. Hulk,” Coulson said just as the Hulk leaped over him to get at the HYDRA vehicles headed his way. Coulson shrugged, “Thank you.” Hulk huffed in reply before he leaped away again to find more things to crush. “Okay team, As soon as the Captain and Widow give the all clear-” Coulson’s words were cut off when a powerful force pierced his back. He tried to contain his scream as the heat of whatever hit him spread through his whole body. He felt like he was burning alive. After seconds of what felt like a lifetime, the heat passed, leaving Coulson a panting, sweaty mess - and it wasn’t the good kind. 

He was on all fours and steam was rising from his skin, but other than that, there were no visible marks on his body that proved he was hurt. There was, however, an excessive amount of hair falling towards the side of his face. Coulson stared at his hands, except it wasn’t his. He started to pat himself but froze when he reached his chest. Those  _definitely_  aren’t his. 

“Shit.” Coulson muttered. 

“Coulson.” Captain America yelled into the comm.

“Phil, are you okay? Where are you?” It was a question, but with the way Clint delivered it, it sounded like a demand, a worried demand but a demand nonetheless. 

Coulson reached for the ICER he kept in his holster and fired at the stupid asshole running away who did this to him. Coulson walked over to the weapon in a baggy suit, picked it up and sighed.

“I’m fine. Someone just shot at me.”

“Phil you don’t sound like yourself.” Widow commented.

Coulson snorted at that. “Wait til you see me.” He picked up a stray chopstick from the ground and put his hair in a bun. “I need two agents dispatched to my location headed for the detention hall.” Then, as an after thought, “Tell Deputy Director Hill I need to borrow one of her field suits.”

—

Coulson waited for the wolf whistle and the laughter to subside, it was mostly from Tony anyway - and a few from Clint, but it had been a whole 3 minutes since he walked into the debriefing room. He rolled his eyes at Stark and cleared his throat. “Are you done?” 

Stark was wheezing now, “I just- wait- I can’t breathe. A girl Coulson.”

“Was this the reason why HYDRA decided to terrorize the city? To turn you into a woman?” Steve asked, ignoring Tony’s laughter.

“I’m not sure.” Phil answered honestly, “But I did manage to get the weapon they used on me, and as soon as Stark has outgrown his childish sense of humor, I’d appreciate it if you could reverse engineer the gun.”

Tony wiped tears from the corner of his eyes and grinned, making grabby hands at the gun. “I’ll see what I can find, but don’t hold your breath on the outgrowing my wonderful sense of humor part.” 

“I believe I said childish.” Coulson corrected him, one eyebrow piqued exactly like his old body used to, except now, the expression was on a more feminine face.

“Potato, Potato.” Tony waved off the concern, looking the gun over in his hands. 

“Will the effects last?” Bruce asked.

“The scientists says that my genetic make-up hasn’t changed and that the effects of the gun should only last 24 hours.” 

“And if it doesn’t?” Natasha asked.

“Then I trust Mr. Stark can reverse engineer the gun enough to give me back my original form.” 

“Please. I can do this in my sleep.” Tony bragged. 

“In the meantime, I expect you all to submit your After Action Reports to my desk by the end of the day. Dismissed.” As everybody filed out of the room, Coulson called for Natasha to stay. “I wondering, if I could, uhm…”

“Bra?” Natasha asked and Coulson nodded. “It hurts your back when you don’t wear one. Come to my room later, and we’ll find you a sports bra that fits.” 

“Thank you.” Natasha gave him a nod and left the room without another word, leaving Phil alone in the room with Clint, who refused to stand from his chair.

“So, you and Nat seem to be bonding.” Clint grinned. “That’s nice.” 

“She’s just helping me through a… peculiar situation.” 

“Am I invited to the sleepover then?” Clint asked, standing to make his way next to Phil.

“It’s not a sleepover, Barton. I’m still going to sleep in our bedroom.” 

“So, no pillow fight in your underwear? talking about boys? doing each other’s hairs?” 

“What? That’s what you think happens at a girl’s sleepover?” Phil asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Well, according to TV it is, TV would never lie, Phil.” 

Phil rolled his eyes at Clint fondly. “Of course not.” He said before going back to fixing his files. 

“So, since you’re coming back to _our_  room tonight,” Clint moved to cage Phil in between himself and the conference table. “what do you say we have some fun tonight?”

Phil tried so hard not to laugh at the very cheesy line. Honestly, he expected so much more from Clint. He straightened his face before turning around in place to face Clint. He used to be just about the same height as the archer even when they were this close, now he needed to tilt his head back a little. He put his arms around Clint’s shoulders and smiled as seductively as he could in the unfamiliar body. 

He drew his face closer to Clint’s until their lips were only a breath’s length apart, “Are you ready to play?” He asked in a whisper. 

Clint grinned in return. “Yessir.”

“Good.” Phil traced the side of Clint’s face with delicate fingers now, and pushed Clint’s face slightly to the side so he could whisper in his ear. “Do you want me to bring Cards against Humanity or Uno?” 

Clint pulled back to give Phil a confused look, the poor man. Phil pushed his face away until he could escape before turning back to the folders on the table. 

“Aww, Phil, no.” Clint whined. 

Phil laughed silently. Sometimes it’s fun to mess with Clint. Other times, it’s hilarious.

**Author's Note:**

> [ Here on tumblr](http://promptmephlint.tumblr.com/post/138281486051/more-avengers-report-coulson-barked-into)


End file.
